By Jay Remer, Columnist
Sometimes, a small act could reshape our politics: What if leaders from all sides paused and breathed, focusing on progress over blame?
Not a strategic pause.
Not a poll-tested one.
Just a breath.
A pause could remind us that public service aims for collective progress, not the defeat of opponents.
Too often, public problems become battles over blame rather than solutions. Housing, health care, education, affordability: each is quickly assigned a villain, and progress leaves the room.
What if, instead of seeking blame, we centered our politics on shared problem-solving?
The most immediate change would not be a sudden flood of perfect policies. It would be a shift in tone. Fewer speeches are designed to embarrass the other side. Less performative outrage. More room for thoughtful disagreement.
Instead, we might hear language that reflects maturity rather than certainty:
“We see this differently.”
“We don’t yet have the full picture.”
“This is more complex than a single policy or party.”
These are not signs of weakness. They are signs of leadership.
Many challenges stall because problem-naming becomes finger-pointing. Most pressures are decades in the making — layered, structural, and shaped by shifting demographics and economics.
When we stop searching for villains, we create space to design solutions.
A healthier political culture would also speak more honestly about trade-offs. Every meaningful solution carries costs — in money, time, flexibility, or patience. Pretending otherwise may win headlines, but it erodes trust. Citizens can understand complexity; what they reject is being misled.
Collaboration would look different as well. Instead of rigid camps, we might see issue-based partnerships that form and dissolve as needed — conservatives and progressives aligning on addiction recovery, rural and urban representatives working together on infrastructure, or business and labor groups co-designing workforce solutions.
That is how complex systems adapt.
Success, too, would be measured differently. Not by who “won the week” or dominated the news cycle, but by durability. Does a policy still work five years from now? Does it reduce pressure rather than shift it elsewhere? Does it make daily life more stable for the people it affects?
These are quieter victories. They rarely generate applause. But they endure.
Perhaps the most important change would be what this approach signals to the public. It would treat citizens like adults — capable of nuance, patience, and shared responsibility. Rather than fueling fear or tribal loyalty, leadership would invite participation: not agreement, but contribution.
Disagreement would remain. It always will. But it would be held without tearing the social fabric that allows for dispute in the first place.
Civility is not politeness.
It is restraint.
It is repair.
It is the decision to breathe before reacting.
In a culture that rewards speed and outrage, that pause may feel radical. Yet complex societies do not survive on outrage. They survive on cooperation, proportion, and the willingness to keep talking — especially when it is difficult.
Let’s make the choice to pause—leaders and citizens alike. Take a moment to consider, before reacting, how our words and actions contribute to building a better, more cooperative society. By doing so together, we can shape the kind of future our communities truly need.
Jay Remer was raised in the United States and emigrated to Canada roughly 30 years ago. Since then, I have been involved in the writers’ community and the hospitality industry. I live in Saint Andrews, NB, and look forward to the day when healthy, civil debates bear more compassionate outcomes. Please feel free to send your questions: jayremer@chco.tv
